Kuta in a Nutshell

Kuta is a corporatized, digitized and colorized madness. It's fast, cheap and easy like a dirty hooker. It's the Las Vegas and Bangkok of Bali, rolled into one. Kuta is the loud, busy, hustling and bustling part of Bali right on the beach. Canadians go to Mexico for vacations, Australia comes to Kuta. The surfing is pretty good, but the beaches are filthy with washed-up garbage and coconuts from faraway lands. The traffic is busy. The bikes are fast, cheap and readily available. The nightclubs go all night long. You can't go 5 steps without an Indo asking if you want a "Transport, motorbike", gesturing with his hands pretending to drive a scooter.

The dogs wander the streets freely. Happy, smelly, dirty, unfixed and smiling dog couples. They stick together and eat together, foraging restaurant garbage and any other tourist scraps they can find. The boys with their balls hanging and the girls with droopy dog nipples, showing a lifetime of puppy-producing. I have been told that Indonesians do not believe in fixing their animals. This can open up a can of worms, so I am going to keep my mouth shut on this one. Hey..... I like puppies.

To some Kuta is home, so sorry if I offend you. Kuta is just not my style. I'm about the green and spiritual stuff. I want to experience real Bali and learn about the culture, not get sucked into the Kuta party vortex. If you want to see people puking, sleeping on the streets, crashing their bikes, swearing and yelling...... head out for a night in Kuta. There is no shortage of drunken, underage and shirtless Australian boys. If that's your thing.

On the bright side, if you are looking for mass amounts of hotels, restaurants and shopping, Kuta is the place to be. The beach vendors are really lovely, so sit down and have a Bintang or two with a local and ask them about their life. Head to La Plancha or La Barca on the beach for cool vibes, sweet beats and cold cocktails at sunset.

Over and out! XO Bali Chick